Padavan
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Hej igen Padavan
Her er noget jeg gerne vil have dig til at kommentere :
´I guess the point of my expressing it is, how ironic it is that M. who speaks eloquently of how things fit together so beautifully in nature and life, seeks in his own personality, to divide and conquer in order to control. While trashing the study of psychology, and denigrating anyone involved with it, he created a division amongst the instructors that demonized those who had inclinations or experience there, that created deep levels of mistrust. In fact, his personality, like anyone´s, was obviously run by the same defense mechanisms we all have. And like most, he seemed oblivious to them. All this was going on around the time of great family difficulty, as it was apparent in his sarcastic remarks that he and Marolyn were having problems. I believe that it was recommended that they get counseling. I think he resented that. Thus, all Psychologists were ´bad´. Pretty basic stuff. Actually, in hindsight, I remember - between bouts of anger that he would do that - feeling both surprised and sad that the ´Lord´ would have a personality so riddled with defensivness. What was he so insecure about? But I dissmissed all that quickly, feeling guilty myself for even attempting to understand the ´divine personality´ in the same terms as I would anyone else. A number of other instructors however, came up to me and let me know they felt M. was dismissive and in fact needed help, and were talking to someone close enough to him to see if he could be convinced to receive counseling. Many others of course saw that as crass arrogance, and I was too confused by my own unwillingness to admit that what I was seeing was true. I was too insecure myself in M.´s presence to trust my own intelligence. Therefore, I denied and denied, casting myself into a terrible inner turmoil. I cried at night sometimes, to ease the pressure of fighting within myself over the seeming contradictions I saw. How can his behavior be so ... well, petty? I could understand him having emotional concerns and relationship problems, but to project them amongst his instructors and set them against eachother to fight and act out his own problems? That seemed so like the behavior exhibited in the unhealthy family structures of abusers and alcoholics. The secrets, (there were many) the need for M to be fauned over, ( a lot! ) the parties and such where the competition to be M.´s favorite, or have him notice you was indescribably thick as custard... It made me sick. In fact, after a while of being exposed to it, I hated being around him. My internal pressure increased the more I witnessed his petty behavior and felt the emotional competition among the instructors, the ´family´ of M.´s world. Once, I won a contest – I scored highest on an instructor test - and won the ´opportunity´ to have lunch with M. I couldn´t eat. I couldn´t talk to him. He seemed to dislike the whole thing as much as I did. It was all so contrived. There I was, in front of all the other Inst. having jumped highest over a stick, now getting the reward of sitting, with a few other notables, at M´s table. People all around the room would turn around to look, as if for that one hour, I was a movie-star, the envy of everyone in the room. Along with the others at the table, I tried to make some small talk to ´open the door´ and try to get comfortable. M. was disinterested, stared off in the distance - was somewhere else - and I felt like a big idiot. The whole thing, the pretense of it all was revolting. So I scarfed down my food, got up and left. It took every ounce of courage in me to walk out of that room. Every eye was on me. I had forty five minutes or so of ´bliss time´ left, and I walked out on it, walked away from the Lord. The struggle within myself was tearing me apart. Were my perceptions correct? Did M. act like an insecure middle school bully, a hurt child not able to admit to his pain, afraid to simply show everyone his vulnerability and admit it like anyone. Were the other people in the room just being themselves, or was I right in sensing the dysfunctional family dynamics I felt was rampant there. Was I just full of my own shit? Was it all just my projection and I just couldn´t handle it? I went outside and broke down, sobbing in disgust and bewilderment, unable to admit that the whole gathering looked and felt like the worst nightmares of my childhood, something I vowed never again to participate in for the rest of my life. Now, here it was again, as the answer to my prayer to serve God. I was heartbroken. At that evening´s party, while M was surrounded by adoring women waiting on him hand and foot, lighting his cigeretts, pouring him drinks, and he enjoyed himself by making the guys do stupid humiliating things, again, I questioned myself. Am I just jealous? Is it that I really want those girls to be fauning around me? Again, the same nausea overwhelmed me and I went back to my room. I wanted to be an instructer. I believed in knowledge, but I was deeply disturbed and afraid inside, because I was so confused about M. I juggled that pain for the next three years, giving talks and avoiding M. as much as I could. Yes, if you want, print this.... I feel too sick to my stomach even now to continue writting. More later... Disillusioned.´ END Post is from Kbh10
Hej, Kbh10! Thank you for your candid and sincere message! Nobody has experienced what you have, so there is no way of judging it. You must have been feeling very lost and lonely at times, and perhaps you still are. Perhaps I was luckier, but it took me many years to understand what Knowledge does. There are many words, but none describe it. It has to be REALISED. I never understood that word until recently it started dawning on me. I have to - and I can! - make it real. Actually, it can happen in a moment, and that moment is always now. It won't work a minute later, and it never works in the past. It is simple, but not easy. Outside of that experience it all looks like insanity. But inside you find yourself in the greatest discovery you can never conceive. Psychology knows nothing of this, but it is not in contradiction. I know, because I have been working as a psychologist for the last 40 years, and being able to see things through the eyes of Knowledge has made my work easy (and successful!). In the world of Knowledge, nothing is like it seems on the outside, but much more meaningful, coherent, loving, playful, personal, you name it... But it is impossible to believe it. It must be realised. And M. has made it possible for me. I couldn't care less about his personality. He just has this unique gift. And he never promised anything else, so I am not disappointed. Well, I could carry on for ever, as I am as excited as on the first day I saw him on a 16mm-Film and had tears squirting from my eyes just from that. I think he can deliver a lot of inspiration to look for the answers within oneself, and most of all, to find it. I never experienced anything like it. So I do what I (comfortably) can to help his mission. Yours sincerely Padavan P.S. Maybe you can begin something with this:
http://www.premrawat.com/facing-the-day/ --Padavan (diskussion) 15. feb 2014, 18:09 (CET)
Hej Padavan
Jeg føler mig temmelig trist til mode efter at have læst hvad du har skrevet , jeg tænker på alle disse store mænd som vor verden har kendt , og om hvorledes de er blevet idealiseret , jeg kan ikke lade være med at tænke på hvorledes en overbevist rødgardist under kultur revolutionen har opfattet Mao , eller hvorledes en menig tysker i 1939 har tænkt på Hitler , eller hvordan en Camboiatisk bonde har været i stand til at opfatte og glorificere Pol Pots tåbelige vision
Jeg ved ikke helt hvordan disse mennesker har oplevet alt dette , medens propaganda maskinen tudede deres ører fulde fra morgen til aften , men man kan godt forestille sig at de ikke havde en særlig stor chance for at fatte virkelighen og faren i alt dette ,netop fordi propagendaen og intet andet end propagendaen var tilgængeligt konstant.
Dit svar er skræmmende , 1 : fordi du er tydeligvis er et dannet menneske der fungerer fint i denne verden og 2 : du lever IKKE i et totalitært system der kontrollerer og begrænser hvilke oplysninger der kan nå dig , du kan reflektere frit , og alligevel vælger du at lukke hele din menneskelighed ned i din personlighed ,kun for at støtte en patetisk charlatan
Begrænsningen i dit verdensbillede er en begrænsning som du selv helt frivilligt har tilladt tiltrods for utallige vidnesbyrd vidner om at han faktisk er et meget ubehageligt og magtbegærligt menneske , du vælger idealiseringen af en personlighed som du kun kender fra din plads på 6 række i salen hvor han holder sine taler .
Ydermere er dit svar dobbelt skuffende fordi det vidner om at selv i den såkaldte frie verden vil mennesker altid være et offer for deres egen evne til at idealisere og selv alverdens viden kan ikke forandre dette .
Tænk bare på de troendes forestillinger om f.eks Jesus og Muhamed ,og husk på at her er (i modsætning til dig ) motervejen til at producere disse forestillinger helt åben og uforstyrret hele tiden , disse profeter kan aldrig dumme sig mere ,fordi de er døde , det er derfor helt op til det enkelte menneske at påklistre disse gestalter alle mulige vidunderlige egenskaber og at hade og slå ihjel under deres forsvar af deres egne selvskabte brandert , og selvfølgelig i deres vidfarne tro på at de forsvarer dem .
Som sagt føler jeg dit svar er dybt sørgeligt , heldigvis er Prem Rawat ikke nogen magtfaktor i vores verden og han vil selvfølgelig aldrig nogensinde blive det , men selve tendensen i den psykologi han har skabt blandt sine elever, og som du giver udtryk for , er en af de farligste gifte der findes og ja , den skal bekæmpes med næb og klør ..................16. feb 2014, 22:02 (CET)Kbh10 (diskussion)§
Du dømmer mig og ikke kender mig. Du har et hoved fuld af det umnd går ind i noget. Dette er ikke en reel kommunikation.--Padavan (diskussion) 16. feb 2014, 22:27 (CET)
Padavan
Jeg dømmer dig ikke , fordi ,jeg ved hvem du er ,så jeg forstår dig, jeg kender dig fuldstændig indefra , alt hvad du siger ,ved jeg at du vil sige , intet overhovedet der kommer ud af din mund ang. Prem Rawat er uventet for mig , faktisk var jeg ,ligesom dig engang , jeg kender HELE historien indefra ,og jeg ved ,sikkert i modsætning til alle andre udenforstående der læser med her , at du opfatter dig selv som et oprigtigt menneske der prøver at gøre denne verden til et bedre sted for alle (eller dem der virkeligt vil forstå ) :-) ..................
Du er indspundet i en fatal sekts ideologi , og der er intet at gøre ved det , kun dig selv kan ændre dette ..............
Best Kbh10 (diskussion) 19. feb 2014, 21:35 (CET)
Lige en tilføjelse , du synes ikke om ordet sekt , ved jeg :-) , netop fordi du er sikker på at det du står for er den eneste gyldige sandhed der findes , og her taler vi om sanhed med stort S , dem der er i en sekt er for dig alle de andre små eller store religiøse samfund eller religioner
Prem Rawats (forretning) er ikke en sekt , hvordan skulle Sandheden nogensinde være en sekt, sekten er løgnen , derfor er du ikke i en sekt ,du er nemlig ikke en del af løgnen , du står for den eneste endegyldige sandhed , og derfor kan du selvfølgelig aldrig nogensinde tilhøre en sekt , sekter er jo der hvor alle de vildledte opholder sig .......................... og der er du overhovedet ikke ............... 19. feb 2014, 22:02 (CET)Kbh10 (diskussion)
Lo and behold
Kbh10, foreslår jeg, at du skriver dine synspunkter på din egen brugerside, medmindre de vedrører artiklen. Jeg vil se dig der, når jeg føler et behov for. Mange tak. Bedste --Padavan (diskussion) 19. feb 2014, 23:21 (CET) Padavan